Sunday, December 28, 2008

burning the memories

Maybe some of you have read my post with a monkey love topic (titled Diary: Instant Love) with the whole 31 episodes in it :p
Well, I deleted it.
I can't figure out y the hell I called it love.
Tho tears did shed, but that doesn't mean he's really the fcking one.
That "thing" started off with a really fucking way for me. but like they always say, regret comes TOO late, occasionally.
The reason I deleted it is because after thinking about it for a couple of hours, maybe three, my amateur psycho analysis told me he was just a release, or so I predicted.
a release is a place where I could let go all of my feelings of unsecurity, the rage, and the solitude I've been living in.
Yeah, I discovered it because the passion I feel when meeting my almost-six-years crush is MORE than the instant crush I found.
MORE as in I truly don't falter around him and it's unconditionally.
(what can I say more? 6 years, fellas. that explains it)
The independent, farcical, prudent,"nerd" figure with a total intimate familial demeanor with his family make me keep falling and falling again.
I'm not saying that I'm a now-this-way-now-that or swaying-with-the-wind typical, but this is what I feel now.
close to derange, that describes best.
Moreover, I just watch Titanic this morning!! (for the hundreds of times LOL)
It is still the greatest love story. ever.
I have tons of bought-consciously-enthusiastic-and-ready-to-watch DVDs, but can't find time to put it in my holiday schedule... and I dont even have a holiday schedule!
I do things randomly when I'm feeling like it but dont know why minutes last sooo fcking fast. sh*t.
The worst part of this holiday is my eating frenzy going frenzierrrrr!! snap. gonna stop.
somebody slap and save me please -_-"
Besides, thinking of food my fcking disorder appetite won't bring me anywhere.
So I decided to think about school *I'm rambling further and more useless*
Even then, I hope this up-coming semester turns out to be a good one like the previous one.
Even better. I hope I can keep the whole achievement I got and bring it up higher! Amen to that LOL.

Okay, my fingers are too fatigued to type, can't say anything anymore.
Let's count down to new year though it'll be late a second.

praying for everything~

Labels: idle streaks, love, miracle

by mELaa o.O~ at 2:30 AM :)