Thursday, January 8, 2009
back to hell
graa. havent posted anything for the last few days cause i'm back to hell.school (equals) hell
school started at monday and i havent got any free time to relax.
so I have to finish all those crummy assignments the teacher gave to us at the first day of school
(what the hell were they thinking giving some stupid assignments at the first day of school?! and it's assignments with s. the teachers are insane to put us through this).
well but since this is the last year of my chaotic senior high years, i will endure it for a half more of year.
The practical exams will be held in february and i cant say no to arrange the schedule for the preparations. and the weird thing is, they say that the
gosh, i'm freaking out. such major weirdo.
diving deeper into hell, aiming to get flying colors and of course the ticket to college ;]
so starting today, i have to love school once again after the big holiday without remedial tests.
school shall prevail upon my mind and heart. what a fcking melodrama.
i hope this words i typed can make things just right.
so this is what i felt yesterday:
and after absorbing the lessons well today, this is how i once felt and feel (again) starting today:
ps:
i am freaking engulf and miss the days at church.
cause that means i'm missing him too.
when i was at church, i would spend the whole day hoping he was around.
but no sign.
i think he's in the middle of his final exams now.
But when i saw him, I just think about how he used to like me and how that still makes no sense to me at all. Why anyone would like, let alone love me, is still beyond me.
But whatever.
Well it's love. make it hurt. i deserve it. cause when you are here. all is well.
and I mean every word of that with every inch of my heart.
foolish me.moron.
Labels: falling even more in love with him, hell, idle streaks, love, school
by mELaa o.O~ at 2:31 AM :)
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