oftentimes, i find that my mouth is very useless.

i rarely succeed in uttering what's on my mind.
i speak through my mind, with myself.
but what i'm feeling or how i'm feeling i cant speak it out.

whenever i talk to God,
hundreds of words conveyed to Him through this mind and heart.
but when i try to speak or spill out what's on my mind - with this mouth of mine,
it's barely worked out.
:(

Especially when i'm with you.
lots of things, feelings, words i want to tell you so bad,
but in the end it is all left unsaid.
i want you to know how i really feel, verbally.
however, i show my feelings to you through how i act.
how i caress your hair or cheek.
how i hug you tightly.
how i hold your hands and play with your fingers.
how i tuck you to sleep.
how i accompany you and just be at your side.
how i search for you whenever your with your friends.
how i wait for your class to finish just to see your face.
how i wanna make you smile.
how i cry whenever you're hurt.
how i look into your eyes and tell you silently, "I'm always here for you"

but at times, i understand that you're tired with my silence.
i want to change.
i need to change.
i have to change.

***


I. L. D